Jennifer Lopez is done blaming anyone else for her marriage falling apart, including Ben Affleck.

Lopez appeared on the Smartless podcast this week and addressed the period surrounding her split from her ex-husband. She said she had to ask herself some tough questions about what went wrong. Instead of pointing fingers, she did inner work on herself rather than lay the blame on her former partner.

What Did Jennifer Lopez Say About Herself After the Split?

Lopez said she went back to “that little girl” inside herself and really looked at her. Her message to that younger version of herself: stop chasing love outside yourself and give it to yourself instead.

It’s a strikingly self-aware admission. Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s relationship played out under more public scrutiny than almost any celebrity romance in recent memory, and most exes use that spotlight to settle scores. Lopez used hers to take inventory of her own patterns.

She put it simply in a Nightline preview months earlier: “I’m in my happy era. I think, for the first time in my life, I feel like I’m free. I’m on my own. And it feels really good.”

Why Jennifer Lopez Says She Had to “Figure Herself Out”

Lopez says the divorce forced her to figure herself out after relying on relationships for most of her adult life. She admitted she didn’t really know what being on her own felt like, since she’d had a boyfriend or husband dating back to her early 20s, and even before that.

“There was always someone in my life,” she said, “and so many things that I felt like were out of my control.” She first married at 28 and has been in relationships almost continuously since.

That’s the real shift behind this confession. It isn’t really about Affleck. It’s about Lopez realizing she’d never tested what her own life looked like without a partner steering parts of it, and deciding, at 56, it was finally time to find out.

How Long Were Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck Married?

The former couple reunited in 2021, 20 years after their initial 2002 engagement, and married in July 2022. By May 2024, the reunion had soured, and rumors of trouble began swirling.

Lopez filed for divorce on August 20, 2024, the exact two-year anniversary of their wedding in Georgia. The Ben Affleck & Jennifer Lopez timeline, in other words, closed on the same date it opened. The divorce became official in 2025.

Signs of strain showed up publicly before the filing. Lopez canceled her summer tour, telling fans, “I am completely heartsick and devastated about letting you down.”

What Does Jennifer Lopez Say Now About the Divorce?

She calls it one of the best decisions of her life. Speaking with Jimmy Kimmel earlier this month, Lopez said her divorce was a great decision and added, “I should have done it sooner!”

That’s a notable shift in tone. Two years later, Lopez says she’s a completely different person than the woman she was in 2024, when the marriage ended after less than two years. She told El Pais she turned to books, therapy, and self-reflection to get through the hardest stretch, saying, “I had a really tough year. Unexpected things happened.”

She added that she’s “only getting more comfortable in my own skin as time goes on.”

Has Jennifer Lopez Said She’s Done With Marriage?

Sort of, though her inner circle isn’t fully convinced. During a 2025 concert in Spain, a fan asked Lopez to marry him. Her response: “I think I’m done with that. I’ve tried that a few times.”

A longtime friend told Rob Shuter’s ShuterScoop that Lopez is “not built to be single” and could “meet someone and be planning a wedding six weeks later,” adding that she “believes in big love, every time” and “every time, she thinks it’s forever.”

This is now her fourth divorce. She’s worn an engagement ring six times in her life. Her previous marriages include Ojani Noa (1997, lasting 11 months), dancer Cris Judd (2001 to 2003), and singer Marc Anthony (2004 to 2014), with whom she had Emme and Max.

What is Jennifer Lopez’s New Movie?

Lopez’s new Netflix romantic comedy, Office Romance, started streaming June 5, 2026. The film also stars Brett Goldstein, Betty Gilpin, Amy Sedaris, Tony Hale, and Jodie Whittaker. Lopez plays Jackie, an airline CEO, opposite Goldstein’s Daniel, her company’s lawyer.

Lopez described it as a classic rom-com with unexpected jokes, different from the sweeter films she’s made before. She’s also set to lead Netflix’s upcoming crime thriller The Last Mrs. Parrish, from director Robert Zemeckis.

This new Jennifer Lopez movie arrives at an interesting moment, right as she’s publicly reframing her personal life, too. She also recently completed Kiss of the Spider Woman, playing aging actress Ingrid Luna in the film adaptation of the Tony-winning musical.

Conclusion

Jennifer Lopez’s divorce from Ben Affleck didn’t break her. By her own account, it rebuilt her. She’s traded blame for self-reflection, says she should have left sooner, and is channeling the next chapter into work, a new Netflix rom-com, an upcoming thriller, and a clearer sense of who she is outside a relationship.

Whether she stays single is anyone’s guess. Her friends certainly aren’t betting on it. But for now, Lopez sounds like a woman who finally stopped looking outward for the validation she needed all along.